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i have had lupus for about two months now, and i am starting to come to terms with the fact that i have to listen to my body and not overdo it. i switched departments at work and went from full time to part time, and my body thanks me for it. but there are some days at work where i feel like my body just doesn’t want to cooperate. my coworkers ask whats wrong, but i just brush them off. i have also cancelled dates with my friends, because i am just not up to hanging out. i don’t want to lose the few friends i have, and i want to be able to trust in my coworkers, but i don’t know how to tell them.
saw my rheumy this week. she did some blood work. waiting on the results. she said she will probably add a new med for me. i already take plaqenil. i am praying its not steroids, but i don’t know what else is out there. there has got to be a better life out there for me. i can’t be in pain every day for the rest of my life. it just isn’t fair. i used to be an athlete, and free spirited, and outgoing. now i feel exhausted, and like a couch potato, and i don’t even want to hang out with my friends because i feel like i will hold them back.